King Mera and Chronic Crum ~ Brothers ta tha Heart

For any possible misunderstanding in last month past time, I never meant to have you believe with any part of your heart that I don't or haven't cared about you... All the opposite and I miss havin a blast with ya man : ) lol... Now you'll know, in case you doubted*

Because I love ya and Miss Ya Maan*

Step up to the Royalty! : )

You're Always Welcome to my Homelands

Hope we can meet or talk soon*

I'm sure anything that was ever a miscommunication wasn't so bad...

I hope things haven't changed.. I remember everything awesome and bless

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Neltjeberg Bay Revelation

Waaay too much Spirit / Tribal Connected Hand Shake

When that thunder and Lightning Roared

Last Full Moon of the Year... I sorry. I Miss ya too*

2015 - Before I went home...

One year later, I still got your back boi : ) lol

The Wildest Fire

I Wouldn't Have Realized it Without ya Brother*

King Mera Dialect... Last Autumn - STT Chapter III Neltjeberg Inspiration

“…I could have died 5 times in the last 6 years.”

“But you couldn’t….”

“No, I could’ve.. but I didn’t.”

“No, you couldn’t.. because I had to see you again.”

“Thats true too. Hey, Praise the Lord, by the Grace of God. That’s the Caribbean Star sayin what your sayin.”

“When it’s your time, its your time.”

“I believe it might be 33 but I’m just sayin.”

“You’ll never know your time. I’m just sayin. When it is your time it is your time. But you do have obstacles that were put in front of you. To put you through trial. And its not really a trial to you to see… what you can take. It is trials to see.. thee.. outcome of your choice, because of how it happen. Because everything that happens that seems like it might have a negative effect on your life…”

“There’s a 6-Day Affect after every near-death experience. I coined it in my Crum Nation Translation.”

“It’s how you take it. And how you realize after; how much life means to you and how much you value it.”

“Absolutely. He’s sayin it and he ain’t even flirted with Death and he knows that.”

“But the thing about me is; I cherish life. So, I.. don’t talk about.. Death. Cause I’m about living. Look, Death is Death. And I am not scared of it.”

“You see that survivor scar?”

“I am not scared of it because, the one fact I know, is that everything happens for a reason. And for a purpose.”

“Because everything has its time and place in time and space~ According to the proverbs of my other Caribbean Brother King Mera. You step up to the royalty. But back to where that Grim Reapers at. He’s been aroused about trying to take my life but… the Grim Reaper is Jesus’ bitch. And the Good Lord got more in store for me so no matter how many times he still try to take my life in the last 6 years, I’m still here. I’m here to drink a beer with you. I’m here to drink a beer with King Mera. And I got love…”

“And we’re here to secure and confirm our brotherly bonds… for… eternity.”

“And that is the truth because Eternal Life is some for real shit. But what’s up about the Grim Reaper… I’ve actually… I’ve kicked it with the Grim Reaper. You remember what I was telling you at Redhook?”

And King Mera says, “I check the camera, to make sure everything is… perfect… For.. your mindset. And.. when I get home I am going to tear my house apart to find some cannabis to smoke.” :)

“Cannabis is the most beautiful thing in the world besides Lady Eve with the gorgeous ass, the skinny waist, the pretty face…”

King Mera says, “Ya know… I’m sorry brothers.. but, I mean… that is true. And thats a fact. Butt on my concept; and because of trials and tribulations I’ve went through in my life. Cannabis means even more to me… than… females. Which means to say.. if I have to go and deal with my.. crop, or go have one-night-stand with sexy-fine-ass-woman…”

“Thats the tight shit too.”

“Stop. Stop. You know what I’m going to do??”

“Your gonna hope she’s in skirts or yoga pants.”

“No, I ain’t gonna hope shit about her. I’m going to go deal with my crop. Because she’s not a one-night-stand. She’s always there. Father know. Marijuana gonja females.. is a female tree. And she is, the love of my life. She never argues with me. She never disputes anything with me. And she will never cheat on me… unless somebody steal herr, of course. Butt that is different.”

“Cannabis is more important in photosynthesis too.”

“Females… are the greatest weakness to mankind.”

“Because their beauty makes us weak.”

“No Chronic, it is more than their beauty.”

“Its their beauty, their compassion, adoration…”

“Its everything about them.”

“…Their spirit, their mixed signals…”

“Everything about them from the beginning of time. From when they open that, that… that second-guessing of what we was meant to know and not doubt.”

“But you know where that second-guessing shit comes from?”

King Mera said, “It doesn’t matter.”

“Over-analyzing. When women look too far into the future and then they go on they hormonal hurricanes it almost ain’t never the same.”

“I understand what you’re saying.”

“Explain it. Because I know so.”

“You feel so… I’m gon’ disagree when you say you know so…”

I said, “…Because, I hope I’m wrong.”

“No… because you’re not a female.”

“Yeah. Butt I love females. And you love females.”

“You’re not a female to know the inner depths of how they look and analyze things… Because they look and analyze things different from how we look and analyze things.”

“Its because they have a feminine heart and they are very complex and feminine and fiery.”

“We can’t begin to think that we know where they come from. Besides the one fact is, is that females act on things in ways that are based on how they feel. And men act on things based on their pride and their arrogance.”

“I operate on my feelings, my thought-process, and my heart. That’s just me though. But I’m different from most brothers. You know that about me.”

“King Mera says, “I’m different from all brothers.”

I said, “Look, Mera.. just listen.. Women… and I point this out, I put this in my book… I’m saying that… in relationships, and in boyfriend and girlfriend, in Twin-Flame-that-came-true, soulmates straight-to-the-heart for the most part… For eternity, and eternal life, and eternal love… I… And its because of my parents. My Dad King Robert Crum, my Mother Connie (she is a Valentine’s Day baby)… They display a dichotomy to me thats heaven and Genesis. They example themselves for what the balances in man and woman should be, ideally. Women… They are the stars in the relationship. More often than not, though this isn’t always so… They are likely the ones that feel the most, want the most, need the most, or even that they would be the ones to express the most. You know what C.S. Lewis says?”

“Who’s C.S. Lewis?”

I said, “He’s the one who wrote the Chronicles of Narnia, The Problem of Pain, Mere Christianity, The Mind Awake, The Screwtape Letters, The Allegory of Love, Of Other Worlds… He wrote a Reflection on the Psalms and The Four Loves too.”

“Oh, okay. I know him.”

“C.S. Lewis says that beauty; we not only want to see beauty or feel beauty. We want something we can’t even describe. We want to pass into it, bathe in it, become a part of it - accordingly. That some Praise the Lord shit from The Emerald Isle. C.S. Lewis is from Ireland and even he says beauty is a power and pleasure through life that incites wild impulses in us. Beauty can captivate us and make us locked in thoughts that are even dangerous to ourselves, per se. C.S. Lewis declared beauty as something we want to bathe in and become a part of, upon passing into it.”

“I didn’t know that.”

“Most people don’t. But when C.S. Lewis says something like that about beauty and I say that they want the most, need the most, feel the most, and express the most. Reason why? It is because their beauty it’s dimensional. It’s complex. They can not-knowingly exert mixed signals from one week to the next even when they aren’t aware of it…”

Mera interrupts and says, “So is men.”

I replied, “Men are more solid and straight forward. I know I am. I’m Irish. I never lie. Just like William Wallace said he never lies. Just like Scotland men too.”

“You just told me your different from most men. You just told me that. Then I told you I’m different from all men. So in saying that. As I just told you that men are the same way, and you can not stand up and tell me that if I get in a relationship with a female that I feel is the love of my life, or a significant other… you can’t tell me that she wants more from the relationship than me. Ain’t no way you can tell me that.”And that made a lot of sense because its true for me too… I appreciated Mera saying this, because, he is the only one who ever has that I have that same principle in common with.

So I was like, “Yeah. That’s true. And feel that same way as well, I want just as much as well, on the flipside.”

“Exactly. Just exactly. Same thing.”

“Counter-style.”

King Mera kept goin’ and said, “Because 9 out of 10 times, because of the world we live in, men like we, are rare, precious, genuine, and unique because we stand for the original principles of what you speak of. Balance and equalness. So, which goes to say, when we enter a relationship, we want equalness. But because of how we love them more than how they love us; we want an equalness; that they would put as much to it as people like me and you would put to them but - when we love them more than they love us - they have that power card to argue for their beautiful solitude that excludes us slowly over time. They could be prone to think of the friend-zoned guys inside their cell phones who could be the next hott possibility for them. If they see that we like them more than they like us, they can tend to lose a sense of interest if they can be entertained otherwise by other guys.”

“Yeah, and more often than not, it is sad because they are beautiful, badass, captivating, and stimulating.”

“Exactly. And, when they see that, they take advantage of it.”

I had Mera know, “I remember you tellin’ me that whole card. If a woman knows a man loves a her more, she’ll always have that power.”

“No. Listen to me, I’m not saying you not supposed to let her know that. I’m just saying that you need to make sure that…”

“That its appreciated and reciprocated.”

“Exactly. Like visa versa.”

“That its appreciated and reciprocated.”

“Which means she needs to prove you stand the same with her. Because the thing about it…” Then King Mera drinks his beer. :)

It made me think of women back at home all throughout Southern Oregon or just women in The States in general. I said, “…That’s the problem with women in America man. That’s the problem with women in society.”

“All women.” Mera explained.

“All women sure. But more so women in America because… all they collect is their pretentious bullshit: they paychecks, they technology devices- they smartphones. They are always buried in text messages and overrated ‘busyness,’ ya know? But yeah, when you say that a woman who knows a man loves her more than how much she loves him; even more so, people like me and you who are unique, sweet, compassionate, (then we both said at the same time) genuine, fiery and inspired by significant others… they wouldn’t recognize that because they’re stuck in their own reflection. Metaphorically, they look in the mirror, they see some single-sided complex of themselves at the same time they can not see people like you and me.” (Then I referred to my tattoo over my heart about single-sided mirrors where a man glows over someone truly and unusually beautiful while she overlooks him for her freedom with other people.)

I continued in saying such a thing, “They can not see the way we mean to adore them or support them. Especially when so many other men are drooling and meaning to try and occupy them. It seems like a vanity thing on their behalf but you can not scrutinize true beauty. You just have to appreciate it for what it is and revere it while you can… And enjoy it while it lasts… even if you cant expect it to be there tomorrow. Even if you foresee it to be gone when you want it most, appreciate while its yours. 3 Libras.”

Mera says, “Even if we feel that they are our Other, or significant other… or… our soulmates… that doesn’t mean that they feel the same way.”

I said, “That’s the problem.”

“You said it perfect.” King Mera looked in my eyes because his countenance lit up and he said, “Exactly! You just said it.” Then he gave me the sacred brotherly tribal handshake and continued in his enthusiasm, “That is the problem.”

We both got amplified in each other’s counsel and I proclaimed some triumph for the both of us because he totally knew what I meant, and in likewise respects that it was true for how I knew what he meant too.

“That is the problem Mera. From Chronic Crum to King Mera on a tribal style handshake - brothers to eternity (we do believe in eternal life too) after we’re done being mortal and we go to the Praise the Lord Portal.” Mera just started huggin me…

We had a moment after such dialogue. But I said, “You know how it gets to the soulmate status? Look… Its when you know that that woman is just as mad, and true, and deep for you as you are for her. And…”

“And…” Mera says, “She inspires you. She strives to help you be better.”

“You said it Mera. You’re Scorpio to the core. I’m lion and more Irish than anyone before… You said it before I, myself, did. But let me give it a deeper meaning. On a Crum Nation translation to my Brother King Mera. You know that John Eldridge from Ransomed Heart Ministries says that there is nothing so inspiring to a man as a beautiful woman. I believe its on page 15 in Wild at Heart. Its a classic Christian blueprint about being wild at heart for the world of a woman, in God’s image (men representing God’s image) because we were meant to. And when you say that we get inspired by a woman? Reasons why, is because their beauty motivates us to be better, wild, or daring.”

Mera agreed and said, “There is a weakness and a strength. Its supposed to be inspiring but not all the time it’s inspiring.”

“It can be super inspiring or super devastating. Your head can cave in for being lost in adoration. Or you can be inspired like the most wildest fire. Love can be a flame where two people burn for each other.”

“You and your crazy intense blue eyes that I love.”

“I got gorgeous blue eyes…”

“Hahahe…”

“But look, listen, stay close.. with women. When I see love at first sight about a woman thats so truly and unusually beautiful. Its almost love at first sight. Keep listenin’. But when thats true, if I get (I hand him my Heineken) captivated or infatuated its because that’s shit is true and its real. And some beauty, its not just the exterior of a woman. Back in my homeland there is pretentious sweethearts tryin to pride themselves on gym-life regimes because they have nothing else to feel passionate for within their confines. Then most of them hunnies don’t know that beauty can also be natural and spiritual. Not fuckin exterior. And then they’re more worried about make-up, smartphones, and their student loan cars. But when her soul is as sexy as her temple, that’s when people like me and you go out-of-control… in the best way.”

“What you say is true. Because most women, they are beautiful by temple. .”

“But not beautiful on the inside.”

Mera says, “Exactly. Exactly.”

“Because, at times, they can be jaded, reserved, indifferent, or occupied. But they are very complex, emotional, social, and significant, and sexy. They’re the best blessing in a man’s life in the name of Jesus Christ. Breasts are antidepressants for men too, Praise the Lord for Eve and I believe.”

“They are the best blessing and the worse curse in my life.” Mera is hilarious.

“They can be the worse curse but thats particularly..”

“They are the worse curse,” insists Mera.

“Not all of em. I disagree with all my heart. They are a worse curse if they be a succubus. If they a Goddess, Praise the Lord. If she a succubus, say your prayers.”

“I don’t mean all of them, of course. Generally speaking. But more so, because.. they are man’s greatest.. downfall.”

“You’re telling me? I died inside for 2 of those things once upon a time after they took the staples out of my stomach.”

Mera says, “They can be a strength to a man as well, true. But their sense of creativity for themselves and their feminine elegance, it blinds us. We get blinded by their beauty, even when they are not conscious of how they have that effect on us.”

I agreed, “When they have gorgeous eyes, vivacious countenance, intelligence, and they are hilarious and easy going, a hot ass, and a compassionate soul. I dunno. I seem to get along better with island girls, cougars, and California women. But sometimes, just sometimes, they would happen to be a person who stands out to me and relates with me well. I don’t dwell on it much, but sometimes there is a rare exception regarding me glowing for a woman I would be honored to know more of.”

“I love all women, no matter where they’re from. But its more about their character. And regarding the women who are drop-dead gorgeous, the women with tight hot bodies, most of the time with women like that, they can often have a nasty ugly soul.”

“That’s where I’m gonna continue saying what I’m saying. When their body or their temple is sexy and especially beautiful, but their soul inside is the same as well…”

Mera intervened, “Which is rare.” :)

“Its hella rare,” I says. :) “Its more rare than a Blue Moon. I have only met 4.”

~~~~~~~~

I knew technically it was only 2 or 3 women, and 2 were the Superlative Virgos while the other was an intrinsic Lady Lion - someone who is a womanly beautiful embodiment of Summer and Winter forever (and everything between). Butt in regards to the 4th lady, a part of me was vaguely considering the woman who was The Girl With Golden Hair at Tap & Still, who was a beautiful stranger I barely knew; I was on the outside looking in when I saw an entire world in that girl before we both knew each other at all.

When Mera acknowledged that women with tight hot bodies can often have nasty ugly souls, and I continued.

“In reference to the women with drop-dead gorgeous temples luscious assets - when their souls and their spirit and intelligence is just as sexy and especially beautiful as their bodies - and a woman’s heart is just as sexy as her exterior, it drives us wild man.”

Mera smiled and put his arm around me as he was drinking a beer. He intervened and said happily that women like that are rare. His eyes even lit up like a little kid that was ecstatic happy. It was hilarious. He looked like a deer in a head light saying it like that while he was drinking his Heineken. And yeah… I told him I have only met 4. It was liberating explaining such a thing to a Brother here in Paradise on my Neltjiberg Revelations.

“Mera man, In my whole fuckin life there were 3 I knew well that were as gorgeous on the inside as much as they was on the outside and thats why, when I love them, I love them forever in an eternal waay…” At this point, Mera began to talk to me regarding something from 7 years ago. He recalled the things I suffered for in My Endless Summer and he recognized something of me and the spells and the hell that I felt long ago.

“When I love them, I love them in an eternal way, for who they are. Even if I can’t enjoy it forever as much as I would like to… sometimes. It kinda makes me think about how 2 people who I loved once long ago - how might those love-souls possibly feel futuristically if I ever passed on or got caught up in an accident again? People lose each other in everyday reality because of the Facebook Race anyways; so much that they don’t feel deeply as humans with emotions as much because of the evolution of social internet is between everything. We seemingly get gridlocked from each other because of the affects of social media on human relationships. We get cut off from past time people that were once were loving. Then only after someone dies, people want to say good things about them in memories and memorials and tributes rather than cherishing life and enjoying each other lovingly as if there would be no tomorrow. I often wondered how The Maiden Legend would feel if I got took up out of this world. And I often wondered if (supposing that would happen) the past-time Goddess of My Endless Summer might feel anything unusual that is worth my spirit knowing of at all… ”

Mera replied, “I say otherwise Chronic. Because, those same two women hurt you, distract you.. and stress you out.”

“Oh you remember… Well, you remember one of them, not the other.”

“And this moment is just as precious as any other moment in life. Okay? You just tell me? I remember.” Mera knew I was aware of how we both knew all things of that nature without explaining so much.

I was like, “It was deep, wild, personal, devastating, and mutilating… I might live forever for it though, I don’t know - as for what it did to my soul. I almost buckled.”

And Mera says to the multitudes, “This is only for genuine blessings and blessed individuals. I love this fucka to death. It is more than words or life would ever express or even show. From another brotherly angel to another - priceless. Step up to the royalty.”

“I went to Dominica and in The Emerald Pool, thats where I’ve ordained certain ideas for a Twin Flame. And after having gone there before Hurricane Erika annihilated The Caribbean Nature Island of Waterfalls, I met a man by the name of Kevin Benjamin. And I found a crescendo of creationism that surpassed anything possible to your naked eye in The United States. It was beyond beautiful. It was like being in a new realm there, at times. I was gonna drown there in The Ti Tou Gorge. And as much as Mera got love for me, Kevin Benjamin was more brother-to-the-core as well to-the-heart than anything that could ever be driven apart.”

“How am I gonna let you finish when you be saying that someone means more to you than me?”

“No no no Mera, you got it wrong, thats a misinterpretation. Scratch that. And homie, the Margaritaville, The Virgin Gorda, the sweeties with cheekies that be rockin hot bikinis on Coki Beach - its all Cruminal Approved. But Mera, what I’m sayin is, Kevin Benjamin is an extra in The Dead Man’s Chest when he be chasin’ Captain Jack Sporrow in the Caribbean Pirates Walt Disney movies man.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I’m sayin’, in Dominica just a half a year ago in June.”

“Yeah, I..”

“Yeah, you remember. My boy Kevin Benjamin is of a Native Tribe to the Caribbean Nature Island and he was my main man in Dominica.”

Mera looks at me and looks me in my eyes and he says, “He looked out for you?”

I was like, “Beyond that Mera.”

“Oh oh! He was me in Dominica?!”

“…YES.”

“Say no more.”

“And that’s why, Neltjiberg. The tribal-style handshake. Kevin Benjamin in Dominica was the first person to do that like how you did with me on the November Full Moon at Neltjiberg Bay. He is one of the most native and ancient tribes in the Caribbean, he gave me this same tribal handshake that you made true on Neltjiberg Bay on the Full Moon after the night of Thanksgiving. And so, when you did this to me, it was the second tribal handshake in all of my Caribbean Paradise, you have no idea - it meant a New Promise to me Mera. I was so inspired. And when you said that it all drives your heart. Or makes your heart driven. With me, it makes my heart on fire. And then I show you my Crescent Symbols and the colors of my fire to the heart. Heat, light, and energy is at its max during the time of the year I was born for. And whereas your Scorpio and I’m Lion, when I shook Kevin’s hand like that in Dominica on behalf of Nazarene, I tore it up in The Emerald Pool.”

“And you make Crum kids?”

“Kevin was in The Dead Man’s Chest, the sequel of The Pirates of the Caribbean. So when he shook my hand first and you shook my hand like that at Neltjiberg Bay at a beach where it was an geographically inverted Crescent, for me, that Full Moon on the Tropical Lagoon; the rain was such a heavy, warm, gorgeous, beautiful storm. That hurricane rain was insane. I’ve never seen or felt anything like it.”

“And the lightning.”

“Yeah. That whole night. That tropical storm. It represented a New Promise to me after a 7 year tribulation within - totally conquered or restored (after all this time). Suddenly, I had hope again that wasn’t laced with hurt at all.”

Mera gestured royalty and declared, “The brotherly bond that is rare and scarce. Soldiers, eternity.”

“King Mera, my point is…”

“Yes King Crum.”

“You’ll find him in my network but he played a factor in making my life better in what is considered to be The Garden of Eden in all the Caribbean Islands. He was chasing Johnny Depp in The Dead Man’s Chest. Too blessed to be stressed. This is whats best, from the Pacific Northwest, women shinin’ with they tank top assets. He means a lot to me. Dominica, The Emerald Pool, Trafalgar Falls, The Scott’s Head, The Champagne Reefs, Victoria Falls… Yeah, he was the YOU of Dominica for me. He is a such an awesome person… anyhow… back with Eve though, and woman, and 101, and feminine fire….”

Mera says, “They are amazing. They are the counterbalance. When a woman loves a man, he becomes her strength. And when a man loves a woman, she becomes his weakness. Then they dance in each other’s circle for balance, power, and compassion - one to the other, and forth and back too.”

At this point of it all, Mera explained something I had known and modeled all along. I conveyed that same exact concept to many people over in my own years far before this moment. The night was coming to an end.. But still, we continued…

I concluded a lot of it all in the vampire hours because dawn was bound to come on soon… To be true, I only honestly have truly loved 2 people in my life. There was a 3rd one who I wanted to love; or who I would’ve loved to of loved - but that was more so just a seasonal chemistry I glowed over and I shouldn’t have thought of it as much as I did just because it all felt so good. Butt the two who I truly loved, I passed them off as two of the most beautiful women in the world. The first was a 9th world wonder to me (in a more metaphorical sense). The second, she was a beautiful maiden that knew how to kiss well. She was very sensual and adorable. She was an incredible fantasy that made my past-time sufferings justified, supposing she could have been a reward for the hell-felt portal I went through. A love at first sight to begin with, in reference to past lives. She became someone who helped me believe in something I didn’t think I could ever regain again. She actually helped me believe in transcending pleasure or the ‘forever’ of it all. She helped me believe in a thought that, with her, something actually could surpass the hindsight ideals I suffered for and believed I could never get back. To me, she seemed to represent a second chance; for the all things I died for inside, once upon a time, this beautiful maiden seemed God-ordained through my own deranged point of view because she not only made up for the way my heart was mutilated, she seemed like a chance that picked up at where beautiful past times were left off from. Meaning, that she seemed to resemble something worth hoping for that could have possibly made my past-time sufferings worth all that unusual hurt; hurt that was too intense to make sense of. She seemed like a futuristic assurance to me that I wouldn’t need to be so lost or locked in hindsight because, futuristically, she was worth being broken and lonesome for for so long - she was worth all the patience and devastation I overcame before having ever met her. Funny thing is though, is that the woman I saw as a Legend, she actually was a lot like the woman who inspired my entire Endless Summer. Except, the Legend of Second Chances, to me, she was void of all the things that the 9th world wonder was so lost in or crossed up for. All the things about a past-time twin flame that were worth confronting or deeming to be unacceptable, things I ultimately ending up hurting deeply for - the Legend of Second Chances was all the best about what I enjoyed a woman for once upon a time, while, at the same time, she didn’t seemed plagued with patterns that came from some kind of jaded etiquette that was seemingly problematic. This maiden woman had such a pure heart too. Her soul, to me, was as bright as a comet in the cosmos. She was so cheerful and vivacious in her body language. That kind of beauty paralyzes me. I couldn’t really explain my insights of her, because they made her cry and she passed me off as the one man who said the most inspiring things of her ever. And she was an angel. She was a beloved feminine deity of unusual radiance. I guess the most straight and basic way to say why I wanted to love her forever is… because… to me, she was just as much down-to-earth as much as she was from the heavens. And I never really had a chance to be entitled to those things because I was too plagued with disaster for a lot of my life. I didn’t have anything to offer her other than just my heart and my time. I tried Valentine’s Day flowers. And Holiday Gardens. But she was young and beautiful and she got swept up into someone else’s whirlwind. For all the things I believed in with her and desired her for or adored her for in regards to my own unusual imagination, she only realized things of me in a new light that were worth feeling something for when it was too late for anything to truly benefit me (as for how I wish it could have been).

There was the 9th world wonder, there was a beautiful radiant legend, then there was a lady lioness that was fire and snow - but she was just a summer chemistry worth glowing for or going mad about. She seemed so cool to me, but perhaps I shouldn’t have felt as fond for her as I did just because she had charisma about going out of her way to hug me and smile and laugh. I mean, she seemed different than the two who I truly loved. She was unique from the previous prototypes before her. And I guess, for that reason, it was more so intriguing. Generally speaking, yes, there were 3 women who caused my heart to feel alive or untame, even when it led to me being insane. But the summer snow was more so bold, adorable, and courageous. It is one thing to recognize a beautiful young woman for her appearance if she is exquisite and stunning. But I saw that her spirit was a lioness and she seemed way too beautiful within, even more beautiful inside than how sexy and alluring her body is and, because I recognized that, I got weak after I got high. Reason why I thought she was more beautiful in a spiritual or natural way is because I saw her get emotional and I realized she was just as compassionate as much as she was gorgeous. I’ll idealize that as example that is unprecedented. I just felt so shocked that she was thankful for the little things. She was going to be a beautiful snow and a tropical fire at the same time in a man’s mind like mine and I wanted so bad to be who she would go with. I imagined having her and hugging her in Hawaii on Magic Sands. But yeah, that was just an exciting seasonal fire. It died out as summer became autumn. I missed summer. But I missed her. I missed her because I missed summer. And visa versa. She was cute. Her voice was really distinct and pretty. And she seemed so sincere and sweet. I couldn’t wrap my head around why things didn’t fall into place like I wish they could have… or how I wish they would have. But even still, the future is a blessing of infinite possibilities for me regarding things not even I can see yet, myself. I just thought I could be who I truly am around this young woman and so, because this is true, the more beautiful thoughts of opening up to a companion or sharing your soul with them in an ongoing battle to stay together, it is honoring to imagine. I mean, the thought of supporting each other, it is logical to see why I was fond of the thought of it. But even still, all 3 of these women, they were who I learned the most from. They are the love-souls that caused me to take life and death seriously. They are the love-souls that caused me to amplify my demeanor in life when I did as much of the things I believed in myself for. Those 3 souls, they were Final in my mind’s eye; a 9th World Wonder, a Legend, and a Seasonal Fire. They all helped me so much. They hurt me as much as they helped me, but those 3 souls reflect my 3 Libras and the Single-Sided Mirrors

When you were 32... We first were Sapphire

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yz9MhWr4VIY

Before my Goodbyes

St. Thomas Chapter III

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